sick cycle carousel

sometimes when i re-read my blog and writings, i find that there is a certain pattern of emotions and events that just repeat themselves everytime more or less with different names, different characters, and different places... the only thing in common is me and yet i do the same mistakes, fall in the same traps, fooled by the same words, dream more or less the same dreams, at one point i realise everything yet i keep fighting to reach the same sad end... dwell on the same wounds, and it all starts over again....
is the reason why it keeps happening that i am too stupid to learn how to choose? or when to stop trying? or is it that i keep trying cause i belive that one time it might definetly work, and that comprmise is essential cause no one can have it all?
and it keeps repeating itself, on an on like a sick cycle carousel as life house say in their song

if shame had a face

I think it would kind of look like mine

if it had a home would it be my eyes

would you believe me if I said I'm tired of this

well here we go now one more time
I tried to climb your steps

I tried to chase you down

I tried to see how low I could get down to the ground

I tried to earn my way

I tried to change this mind

you better believe that I have tried to beat this
so when will this end it goes on and on

over and over and over again

keeps spinning around I know that it won't stop

till I step down from this for good
well I never thought I'd end up here never

thought I'd be standing where I am

I guess I kind of thought that it would be easier than this

I guess I was wrong now one more time

I tried to climb your steps

I tried to chase you down

I tried to see how low I could get down to the ground

I tried to earn my way

tried to change this mind

you better believe that I have tried to beat this
so when will this end it goes on and on

over and over and over again

keeps spinning around I know that it won't stop

till I step down from this

sick cycle carousel